Grumpy Old Man

Am I becoming a grumpy old man? You be the judge.

Okay, I have no problem with the Muscular Dystrophy Association–in fact I have given money on and off over the years. I also have no problem with firefighters. These folks are heroes that are always there and stand ready to risk their lives to save ours. I have no problem with streets–they are a wonderful tool to get us from point A to point B.

What I can’t stand is the one time every year where these three wonderful entities converge to piss me off. Yes, it’s the annual Fill the Boot campaign. This is where thousands of firefighters across the country take to the streets to clog up traffic and endlessly badger motorists to throw some money into some smelly old boot for MDA.

How can this be legal? Who else can stand out in the middle of the street, beg for money, and get away with it? That’s right, no one. But apparently law enforcement looks the other way because it’s the firefighters. For like the last 5 years, I’ve threatened to complain to law enforcement to get this harrassment stopped. But I never have. And I probably won’t this year. And probably never will. I’ll just keep complaining to anyone else that will listen.

The Sharing Table

In our break room, we have something called the Sharing Table. It’s really a pretty cool idea. If you have something you don’t want, but someone else might, you put it on the table. If you find something you want on the table, it’s yours for the taking.

People put all kinds of interesting thing on the table: free event tickets, coupons for local eateries, home garden overflow, paperback books, magazines, etc.

However, some people abuse it. We’re now seeing catalogs for Avon, Amway, Tupperware–you know, all the try-to-guilt-your-friends-and-family-into-buying-your-over-priced-crap home businesses. People are also leaving brochures inviting us to their various cry-me-a-river charities. I’ve got nothing against home business or charities–only the abuse of the Sharing Table concept. With the Sharing Table, it needs to be a tangible good that I can pick up and take with me.

However, I reserve my most intense ire for those that leave pizza leftovers there. What? How could I possible not like pizza? It’s because the only pizza that’s ever leftover is friggin’ vegetarian pizza! If you’re going to have leftover pizza and you’re going to leave it on the sharing table, have the common human decency to make sure there’s some meat-lover’s pizza also…mmmkay?