The Grocery Shopper From Hell

I think I ran into a 60-year-old lady that was on her first-ever grocery shopping trip. She was in front of me at the checkout line. She had placed her items on the conveyor belt and was standing there clutching her purse. The clerk asked for her loyalty card (I hate those things, by the way). The lady stood there in silence for a moment and then said “Hmmm?”. The clerk asked again: “Do you have a loyalty club card?” Finally you could see the 20 watt bulb above her head flickering ever so faintly. She opened her purse and rooted around in there for approximately 3 days before she found it. The clerk took her card and the clerk scanned it. The lady then returned the card to her purse and closed it.

The clerk scanned her items and said “Your total comes to $26.37″. Oh no…I saw that the light had gone out again. The lady struggled for a few moments to understand. Then she finally jerked just a little as the light flickered back to life and she realized that she needed to pay. She opened the purse again and fumbled around trying to find her wallet. She found it, then painstakingly searched for the correct bills and change. I was dying as she counted out what felt like 2,637 individual pennies to pay for her items. Has she ever heard of a debit card? Has she ever heard of not taking 6 days to complete a simple grocery purchase? In general, I’m a pretty patient, easy-going guy. She really tried my patience. But I was nice. I didn’t say a word.